An Aura of Fail

Failure is an event, not a person. Yesterday ended last night. ~ Zig Ziglar


Sorry Zig, but I disagree.

A friend and I were talking over Skype earlier, and the conversation went like this:

Friend - Do you every secretly enjoy seeing someone you knew from forever ago and seeing that they are just trainwrecks of people?


Me - Yes, absolutely. There was a girl in my neighborhood growing up, who was the real-life equivelant of Beth [current arch-nemesis in a game this friend and I both play] for me at the time. (Isn't there always one of those?) Anyway, I FB stalked her and saw that she was just horrible looking, in the way hookers are if they live into their 60's and breathed a sigh of relief. I may be carry a few extra pounds, but my skin is a natural color, my hair is its (relatively) natural color, and I will never make the mistake of using day-glo orange foundation before putting on cosmetics.


Friend - Yeah, same sort of thing, she got fat, has no life, no kids, no job.  I laughed a little inside.


Me - This chick is anorexic thin, with orange skin from too much tanning bed time, and her hair is frosted that grayish blonde of the 80s. And she tried to get her cosmetics to match, but it just gave her an aura of fail.


Friend - Ewww.

It was very ewww, indeed. Everything about the picture she used for her icon gave her an aura of fail, and it was just made more glowing by the lack of concern to grammar and spelling in her status updates. Looking at her actually made me feel a little bit better about me. And I didn't feel bad about feeling better about myself. Let's face it. Because her house lacks teenagers and two large-breed hounds, it's probably not overrun with clutter and dog hair.

So there you have it. Despite the fact that deep down I am insecure and have all these issues to sort out if I ever hope to achieve anything that comes anywhere close to a state of normalcy, I can also at times be as shallow and petty as a cheerleader character vying for prom queen in film made for the Lifetime Movie Network. I'm not proud of it, but I am honest about it.